03/19/11: Headfuck

March 19, 2011 at 7:48 pm (Titled Poems) (, , , , , , , )

I keep tasting you in my brain
I can still feel you on my tongue
These shivers on my back
Do you know they’re never gone?
Your angry little fist
Is crushing this heart of mine
I’m heaving and bleeding
While you count back the time
I put myself into this
While you fell in face first
So how am I the one here
Sitting shitfaced and cursed?

If you watch Skins, you’ll know who inspired this one.


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03/12/11: Naïveté

March 19, 2011 at 7:43 pm (Titled Poems) (, , , , , )

I’m going to be all that you want me to be
I’m going to laugh when you make fun of me
I’m going to love everything that you do
And you’ll wake up each morning saying “I love you too”

I will write you songs no one else will hear
I will not make you shed even a single tear
I will take you places, I will give you the world
I will stay with you, I give you my word

I will plan out adventures to faraway lands
I will memorize the texture of our intertwined hands
I will make you promises I will forever keep
I will hold you so tightly when we go to sleep

I’m going to remember each and every date
I’m never going to be even a minute late
I’m going to whisper everything that I feel
I’m going to promise this will always be real

Everyone starts out so naive.

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03/12/11: Japan 8.9

March 19, 2011 at 7:38 pm (Titled Poems) (, , , , , )

We stand and we watch
Hands clasped behind our backs
The earth crumbling under our feet
And lives crashing out at sea
We wash ourselves of debris and guilt
Sending mere words when the end seems so near
What have we got that we won’t ever lose
Aside from the choices we all have to choose?
So what do we cling to, apart from ourselves?
When the world comes crashing, it all goes to hell

Felt so heartbroken and useless during the Japan tragedy, all I could do was watch and pray.

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Undated: Untitled

March 19, 2011 at 7:27 pm (Untitled Poems) (, , , , , , )

Somewhere down my throat
My words got stuck
Somewhere down the drain
The blood had dried up
You never seem to understand
You never seem to care
And underneath it all
We both know it’s unfair
No, you don’t ever bleed
And I’ve never seen you cry
You only stare blankly
Each time I ask you why
Why did you not follow
Those times I walked away
Why haven’t I heard
The things you longed to say
It’s all bottled up
You hide beneath your skin
So that I’ll never see
Where your heart has always been

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December 12, 2010 at 2:48 pm (Untitled Poems) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Will we see each other
After all this is over?
Will we find in each other’s eyes
All the truths beneath our lies?
When all the sky’s a deeper red
And all our loved ones have dropped dead
Will our pain help us understand
All the blood that soaks our hands?

Have all the deaths turned out worthwhile
Just to see our children laugh and smile?
Each step they take had cost a life
Someone’s father, their lover or wife
Do our tears make up for it all?
For how swiftly we caused them to fall?
Their dying screams that haunt our sleep
Are all we have of them to keep

Wrote this right after I read The Hunger Games trilogy. Was totally channeling Katniss.

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August 26, 2010 at 4:18 pm (Titled Poems) (, , )

It comes in waves
Hitting harder each time
Pulling back for strength
Then charging like soldiers in line

It is never still
It is never calm
It is a live grenade
Sitting on my palm

And though I wish to face it
I know I’ll only drown
For each time that I jump up
I will eventually fall down

Short but means a lot to me. Forgot to write down the date. Pft.

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06/21/10: No Fighting Fate

August 26, 2010 at 4:15 pm (Titled Poems) (, , , )

It’s too late for us to ever be apart
It’s too late for us to have a change of heart
Can’t you see, we’re knee-deep in our shit?
Can’t you see that all the right pieces fit?

What’s the world to offer us that we haven’t already got?
What other battle is there that we haven’t already fought?
These wounds you see that pepper our skin
Are they not our penance for our unspoken sin?

We kiss, we make love, we fight and we bleed
We reap what we sow, but we burnt our last seed
There’s tears in our eyes and truth in our words
Can’t we please put down our shields and our swords?

It’s time to stop this silly little game
’cause we both know it always ends the same
When it’s meant to happen, there is no escape
Since this love is true, there’s no fighting fate

Writing from the POV of a character in my head again.

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12/27/09: Getting to Know Ana

February 14, 2010 at 1:29 pm (Titled Poems) (, , , )

“I know you,” I said
But she smiled
And said, “You don’t.”

I reached for her hand
But she clasped her heart
So tightly, it almost burst.

The blood dripped instead
Slow and steady
“Drip…drip…drip,” it said.

Her answering smile was dubious
I took back my hand
“I don’t know you at all,” I agreed.

She held out the beating heart
And my chest was hollow
“Yes, you do.”

And then she cried.

Another weird one, both about/for the same person.

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12/27/09: The Distant Escape

February 14, 2010 at 1:25 pm (Titled Poems) (, , , , , )

We are mere mortals and I see that now
We are kicking, we are screaming
drowning in this clandestine romance we have
with a life that was never ours
What use is the night when we cannot close our eyes
against the evils of the day?
What use is the door when we cannot lock
the demons of our past outside?
Our bodies are tarnished forever now
our wounds, open and bleeding red
Our empty hands claw for the world
with fear and pain as our only light

This sounds really weird. But I wrote it for someone really special to me.

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10/05/09: Bereft

October 7, 2009 at 6:48 am (Titled Poems) (, , , )

I have lost myself
Or what I thought of as me
I see that now
Feel it in the wind
When it whispers empty songs
and I stand unmoved
The sun has lost its shine
Flowers, their luster
And the stars, their twinkle
I fold into myself
Trying to grasp
the profound nothingness
I have been reduced to
I lay in the dark
hollow and bereft

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